You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
