Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize
