So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Randomize
