Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
I just sucked dick on a ferry
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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