I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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