We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
