I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
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