I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
I understand Curling. That high.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in