My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Randomize