That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Randomize
