You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
