I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize