I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
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