I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
