I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
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