Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I AM VODKA MAN
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Randomize