The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Randomize
