SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
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