yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
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