What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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