he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize
