windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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