Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
I need water and some morals
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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