do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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