Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Randomize
