omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
lol hangovers are for mortals.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
