why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
Randomize
