I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
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