god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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