That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
Randomize
