i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
