so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
