So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Randomize
