She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
Randomize