ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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