nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
do herpes really smell.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize