SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Randomize