Whoa Z and x make the same sound
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
Randomize
