I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
Randomize