Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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