Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
Randomize