question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
