So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
I'm having to shit out rocks
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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