You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
