Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
