He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
Randomize
