I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
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