took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Randomize
