He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
