stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Randomize
