He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Randomize
