I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Randomize
